Parents cannot just relax when their kids turn out to be 18. They have a responsibility to see through that their kid is still doing the right things and gear them towards a purposeful life even when things seem very bleak. So what do you really do? Read on to find out.
Bear with your child through thick and thin, instilling him continuously with the right values, principles and ethics. How do you manage to do that?
Let me cite you an example of my youngest sibling. He lost his Dad when he was only six. Yet, with the love of his mom and his sisters, he grew. But did he grow up to be the right kind of adolescent?
His sisters left for abroad either to settle or for higher education and then he had only his mom to guide him. Was he following the right path?
No. In fact he wasn’t. He dropped classes at school and only liked to play the guitar and chat online on the computer. He became out of reach and out of control. His sisters talked to him and gave him lovely gifts and asked him to at least attend private tutors’ coaching classes. That is how he made through his O-levels and A-levels under University of London.
And then it was time to get to University. He had formed a liking for Physics and so all of us encouraged him to study Electrical and Electronics Engineering, our family being an engineer family. So did he make it straight away?
Again no. The teachers at the university failed to capture his interest and there was the trouble of massive traffic jam on the way. My brother started missing classes again. He was totally absorbed in playing the guitar and downloaded further musical tabs from the web, got a sound mixing amplifier and more guitars and played more music on them, created music and went for jamming sessions with his favorite guitar.
We knew he was making a gross mistake with his life. Music on the guitar pays very poorly in our country unless you are a really renowned musician.
It happened around that time that our little sister was getting married abroad and invited us to join her ceremony. In fact it was Good Almighty God playing on us.
When we went abroad we let our brother speak out about what he really wanted to do with his life. It was our brother’s turn to talk. And he said promptly that he was willing to study abroad. My second sister then informed him of a nearby school where he could major in Electronics and Electrical Engineering, physics being his favorite line of interest and take music as minor: he could still play on his guitar.
Having that settled, he applied and gave the necessary tests to enroll in. He had his credits transferred from his previous university. Eventually he finished graduating from his program with flying colors. Of course there were hard times for him but he made through them. And he was finally a graduate.
The next step in his life was to get a job. But every job seeking company that called in for interview remarked that he had to be a citizen. Meanwhile while he was on the job hunt, he was doing a short internship in the field of Computer Science – PHP programming.
As he couldn’t find a job abroad, not being a citizen there, he returned home and started applying for jobs here. Within a month’s time he got himself into a web programming firm, the emphasis being on PHP programming. I know what it is like to program in PHP. It is a never-ending process where you keep on learning every day.
Currently my brother is in this loop in a good kind of way. Two days ago he sold his last guitar, further putting his entire concentration into web and PHP programming.
Now that is what would look like a purposeful and mature adult, doing his work dutifully, loving it too, getting rid of his addiction for guitars completely. Ha ha. Good for him!!
Can you as a parent train and raise your kid to be this way? It takes a bit of determination and willpower. The rest is up to Almighty God. But don’t ever give up on raising your kid to be a smart, purposeful adult. You do have some responsibility to shoulder in this aspect. God bless!!